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Friday, March 6, 2009

The Teacher and The Boy

A first grade teacher, Ms Neelam (age 28) was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Boy, what is your problem?"

The Boy answered, "I'm too smart for the first grade. My sister is in the third grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third grade too!"

Ms Neelam had enough. She took the Boy to the principal's office. While the Boy waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms Neelam he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions, he is to go back to the first grade and behave. Ms Neelam agreed. The Boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him. The Boy agreed to take the test.

Principal : What is 3 x 3?
Boy : 9
Principal : What is 6 x 6?
Boy : 36

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third grader should know. The principal looked at Ms Neelam and told her: "I think the Boy can go to the third grade." Ms Neelam asked the principal if she can ask the Boy some of her own questions. Both the
principal and the Boy agreed.

Ms Neelam : What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Boy : Legs!
Ms Neelam : What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?
Boy : Pockets!
Ms Neelam : What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains Thin whitish liquid?
Boy : Coconut!
Ms Neelam : What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, the Boy was taking charge.

Boy : Bubblegum!
Ms Neelam : What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer...

Boy : Shake hands
Ms Neelam : Now I will ask some, "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?
Boy : Yep!
Ms Neelam : You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.
Boy : Tent
Ms Neelam : A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always have me first.

The Principal was looking restless, a bit tensed and took one large Patiala Vodka peg.

Boy : Wedding Ring
Ms Neelam : I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.
Boy : Nose
Ms Neelam : I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Boy : Arrow!
Ms Neelam : What word starts with a "F" and ends in "K" that means lot of heat and excitement?
Boy : Firetruck!
Ms Neelam : What word starts with a "F" and ends in "K" and if u dont get it u have to use ur hand?
Boy : Fork!
Ms Neelam : What is it that all men have one, it is longer on some men than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after they're married?
Ms Neelam : What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has lots of veins, like pumping and is responsible for making love?
Boy : HEART!

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher:
"Send this Boy to College! I got the last ten questions wrong myself!"

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